Chelsea Handler takes her vacations very seriously.
In a new Instagram post shared on Wednesday (July 22), the 51-year-old comedian wrote, “It’s family vacation season, which means it’s time to reread the rules. If you want to vacation with me, these are the rules.
The post featured an excerpt from her 2025 book I’ll Have What She’s Having, in which she wrote a letter to her extended family establishing her strict vacation rules she expects them to follow after she paid to take them all on a trip one year.
“So it is with great love and hope that we can use this an opportunity to get better at being together,” Chelsea wrote. “Our family is dysfunctional, and that is what families are. What we need to work on, however, is manners.”
She then goes on to list some of the proper vacation etiquette she wants her guests to follow, including acknowledging housekeepers and workers with the proper “decency and respect.
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“It is the nice and decent thing to do, to be conscientious of the others who are also on vacation with you,” Chelsea noted, later adding that she needs everyone “to say please and thank at every opportunity, and more often.”
Another rule she has is “Do not consume copious amounts of alcohol on multiple occasions,” noting, “I want you guys to have as much fun as possible, and that includes drinking or taking edibles or playing video games, within reason. Do not abuse this privilege.”
Chelsea also stressed that her family clean up after themselves and not to leave a mess for someone else to clean up.
She went on to say that everyone is required “to be present” and not on their phones or playing video games when they are spending time all together, which she said she wants to happen every night.
“A good rule of thumb as a guest is to never finish something,” Chelsea later wrote. “When I make a pitcher of margaritas, don’t finish that pitcher unless you’re willing to make another.”
She also stressed, “Do not come out to eat if you can’t control your mood. Everyone in this family is old enough to make eye contact with restaurant workers, and every other adult you come in contact with. It is the decent and polite thing to do, and it will help you in life to be KIND to strangers, and it is now a requirement.”
Above all else, Chelsea emphasized that going on these trips is “not guaranteed.” Instead, they require a “contribution” from her guests.
“A contribution does not mean financial,” she wrote. “It means: What pleasantness are you planning to bring on vacation? It is not a free-for-all.”
Chelsea went on to add, “I don’t care how much our family annoys you. It’s the only one we’ve got, and we are stuck together for life.”
If you didn’t know, Chelsea is the youngest of six siblings. Her sisters are Shoshanna and Simone and her older brothers are Chet, Glen, and Roy. Sadly, their eldest brother Chet died in 1984 during a hiking accident in Jackson Hole, Wyoming when he was just 22.
Chelsea recently shared an update on her relationship status.
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